“Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain.
You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today.”

–Pink Floyd

If you take a moment to think about it, you may agree with me when I say that time is really the true meaning of this life (if there is any meaning at all).  It’s the very medium through which our lives on Earth travel.

How we use our time is about the most important aspect of our individual lifetimes.  I believe, and generally think most people would agree, that the best use of our time is to explore, learn, and love.  Deceivingly simple.  Disarmingly straightforward.  True nonetheless.  Time is mired in contradiction—we are all so painfully aware of it, yet blissfully unaware all at the same time.  We know it’s there, we sometimes manage to “feel” it going by, but it is so abstract that it is utterly intangible beyond vague concepts of our three-dimensional minds.

Time is the untouchable.  The uncontrollable.  The crux of our lives.  And nothing pisses us off more when it is lost or wasted.  You can work hard to regain lost money, to refill the void of lost love.  But there’s nothing you can do about lost time but hope you have enough left to make up for it.  That makes it the ultimate currency of our lives.

And in the end, the only way to achieve the fundamental perspective of the lives we have lived is to take a step outside of time to view it all as one, comprehensive whole.  A blob of interconnecting moments that we can hold in our hands and can hopefully say: “this is good.”

But the bottom line boils down to one simple, inescapable fact about time: without it, we have nothing in this world.  So what else is there to say about it?  It’s our most precious resource, one to be used wisely.  And I won’t take up any more of yours for the moment.

It’s been said that it takes 10,000 hours of practice and preparation to be an expert at something (notably in the book Outliers by Malcom Gladwell). 10,000 hours to be a genius, to be a success. The Beatles are the common example. They were no overnight success; by the time they started hitting it big, they had played over a thousand shows (mostly in Germany).

Ten thousand hours is a pretty long time. It’s well over a solid year of practice with no sleeping or eating to get in the way. If you practiced something for two hours a day, every day, it would add up to over 13 and a half years. At the time of this writing, I’ve been playing guitar for about 15 years. Sometimes I’ve played for 4 hours in a day. Sometimes I’ve played for no hours in a day.

Am I an expert musician? I wouldn’t personally say so. But I’ve certainly come a long, long way. The thought of going back and doing it all again is almost excruciating. I’m at a point where I really feel good things are happening and I’m actually ready, willing and prepared for them to happen. But that’s a tough place to get to. If you had told me even a couple years ago that I’d have to wait at least another couple years, I’d have gone a little crazy. Sometimes it’s really good to not know things.

But what I wonder about the 10,000 hour rule is if emotional time counts. There have been countless minutes that I did not spend working on music, for example times when I couldn’t do it because I was stuck in a classroom learning about the symbolism of The Great Gatsby. But many of those same minutes were spent in a place completely away from where I physically was. A place where I was composing music in my head, conjuring ideas for promoting the next show, dreaming about the feeling of being in the recording studio with a guitar in my hand, laying down a track that moved me. Those were genuine emotional hours I’ve put into music. If they counted, I’d say I reached the 10,000 mark long ago.

Practice makes perfect, but passion makes it authentic.

Today is the perfect time to think about tomorrow.

We all have plans for 2010, grand or otherwise.  I never really make resolutions because they just feel like I’m trying to convince myself to break habits I don’t feel confident breaking.  Plans usually have more structure and wonderfully loose ends, whereas resolutions are uncomfortably finite.

Now is the best time to think about later.

What are some of my goals for the year?  Inspiration; I want to be inspired by life and I want to learn from the ways people around me are living it.  Passion; I love what I do when it comes to music.  I’m also planning on loving life itself.  The ups, the downs, the in-betweens.  Mission; I hope to spend the year working hard but also having meaning behind what I do.  Meaning creates drive, and drive gets you places.  Connection; I hope to feel the transcendence I’ve felt so many times before from the interconnectedness of the people I know, the people I meet, and the people I learn about.

I also want to floss more.

Only time will tell what 2010 will bring, but I’m planning on making the best of it.  2009 was an unbelievable year for me for so many reasons.  It only makes me fascinated to wonder what the next one will have in store.

If you’re interested in a little thoughtful inspiration for the new year, take a look at this free eBook: What Matters Now

And since I didn’t post it before, I’ll close out ‘09 by posting the new Shaimus video for “Like a Fool”

Birthdays are a lot like New Year’s Eve in that they are often a time when people reflect on the year that’s past, how they’ve grown, what they’ve accomplished, and maybe mistakes that they’ve made.  Some people fret about another year that’s gone by and how much shorter life seems after every 365 days.  Other people don’t think about it too much at all and just use it as an excuse to party.  I think I’ve done all three at one point or another.

But usually I spend at least a little time reflecting on all the things that have happened and how much I’ve changed over the course of a year.  I assume the average person goes through about as much or as little as I do in any given year, so I rarely find the need to openly share things I’ve learned or accomplished.  But as you reach your mid and late 20s, I think it’s only natural for a lot of people to start feeling like their youth is slipping away more and more quickly as their age rises.  I’ve certainly felt that before, but I’m finished with it.

In the relatively unconventional life path I’ve chosen, I can’t use the lives and accomplishments of my peers as a comparison to my own, even if they’re in the same industry as me.  Life is long and I have a lot of time to do all the things I eventually want to do (hopefully, anyway).  I set no deadlines and I make no ultimatums.  I have goals and aspirations that I work towards every day, and as long as I’m doing everything within my power to be where I want to be, the rest is out of my hands.  All I can do is live life to the fullest extent that I know how; seeing where it takes me is the whole adventure of it all.  I have found that getting too specific with life’s grand plans only takes away from the point.  And the point is the unknown.  I prefer to keep specific goals and projects to shorter term time frames.  It makes so much more sense this way.  If you say “I’m going to do this before I’m 30,” you’re putting unnecessary pressure on yourself, causing you to worry about it now and later be disappointed with yourself if you don’t meet the arbitrary deadline.  Especially when there’s plenty of time afterwards to accomplish the goal just as well.

Don’t say “I’m going to see the great pyramids before I’m 35.”  Don’t say “I want to be married by the time I’m 30.”  Keep the hopes and dreams, and lose the deadlines.  Your life will be so much more fulfilling that way.  Of course, you still have to go out there and DO it.  You have to live your life.  You have to work towards the goals every day.  But if you say you want to see the pyramids before you’re 35, you might wait until you’re 34 and start to panic.  So start now.  Or start later.  But I think it’s a good general rule to not apply anything with the word “dead” on it to my life, so that includes deadlines.

I want to live in New Zealand someday.  I’m not sure when, but I definitely want to.  It could be when I’m 32.  It could be when I’m 52.  I’ll figure it out at some point, but I haven’t yet.  And that doesn’t matter.  Life’s not passing me by, I’m just along for the ride.  I can’t wait to see where it takes me.

Social networking.  A now-ubiquitous term that conjures images of Facebook, nerds, wasted work hours, and (thanks to recent Foster’s commercials) grimy Australians shouting at each other from a distance.  These days, it seems you can’t enjoy a useful website without having to sign in, make a profile which reflects the person you’d like to be in the cyber world, and start spending your time networking, “friending,” and generally sucking up precious minutes connecting with other theoretical people.  At this point, while I don’t mind having to sign into various sites, the social networking side of things starts to scare me off; as soon as I know I can have buddies, friends, or whatever-the-hell, I think about how much work goes into doing that, how little energy I actually want to exert on it, and how having a small buddy list makes you look inadequate and renders the whole thing pointless (not to mention the question of whether or not I would insult potential “friends” by not adding them due to my high level of apathy).  Can’t I just post some videos online without seeing the dreaded e-mail that says “jdpstudman wants to be your friend?”

I’m generally in the minority on this from what I can tell.  Social networking as a prerequisite for a successful site can only mean, I assume, that most people demand the feature in as many aspects of their daily lives as is possible.  So I’m not one to knock it as a concept, really.  I’m a “live and let live” sort of person–I don’t generally care what you do as long as you’re not hurting me or others.  People can social network the shit out each other for all I care.  And it’s not as though I take no part in it.  I’m on Facebook daily and I enjoy reading the occasional witty status update (operating word: OCCASIONAL) and seeing photos of my friends’ recent drunken escapades.  But I just can’t bring myself to fully embrace the extent to which it’s taking over our daily lives.

Because I enjoy Facebook, I try to make it my primary, and if possible only, mode of social networking.  I don’t want to log into ten sites a day to see what YouTube videos random people have posted.  It’s because of this that I’ve all but abandoned MySpace, the original outlet of most people’s networking needs.  But MySpace is a good example of a necessary evil for musicians; I don’t really want to be on there, but it’s important for all bands to have a page.  It’s like Twitter, which has been blowing up as of late.  I do have a “personal” Twitter, but it’s just a feed of my Facebook statuses and I never really use it other than that.  I’d probably avoid Twitter altogether if it weren’t for the fact that it’s important for Shaimus to have a presence on the site.  Maybe I’ll use mine more often later on, but for now it’s really just kind of there as a placeholder for when I decide what I really want to do with it.

This blog is no different, really.  I’ve spent a lot of time pondering what specifically to use it for.  Just news updates?  Boring.  Deep, intimate descriptions of my thoughts and feelings?  Too personal.  A long, thoughtful post every six months?  Seems too infrequent to keep anyone interested.  Constant little posts about what I’m doing?  Seems to revealing or mundane.  So what, then?  I’m still not really sure.  One of my least favorite aspects of social networking is the constant urge it gives you to say what you’re feeling at any given moment, and the constant feeling of others that they’re close to you and keeping up to date with your life by reading a few sentences a day.  I don’t want anyone to think they know me via the Internet, and I’m a private person who is well aware that in my industry the more success you have, the less privacy you often get.  I’m increasingly cautious of what I put out there online, how I present myself, and how much I reveal.  But at the same time, it’s so great for musicians to use the Internet to connect directly with fans and have them feel involved.  It’s a double-edged sword for sure.

And so I’ll continue pondering and strategizing my online presence, probably to no end.  But luckily I have no obligation to decide either way what kind of “social networker” I am.  Many people have found their place, but I have not.  And that’s OK for now.  I’ll just continue on with my everyday life as I normally would, but with an option to be a little more “connected.”  I just have one simple request: don’t buy into the idea that just because you CAN constantly update people with your activities, it doesn’t mean they really care that the club sandwich you had for lunch had way too much mayo on it.  Some things are best kept to yourself and left a little sacred; the inane things are the most sacred of all.

Oh the silence around this blog has been deafening lately.  Though it’s easy to say I’ve neglected my duties, that’s pretty inaccurate since I don’t technically have any “duties” to take care of on my site.  The easiest promise to live up to is one you don’t make, so I’ve happily made no promise to update at regular time intervals.  But it’s true that long stretches between posts doesn’t do much for my blogging cred, though I still subscribe to the “quality over quantity” school of thought.  Or anything over quantity, really.

Spring has turned to summer, and the mercury has steadily risen.  What have I been up to?  Everything and nothing at the same time it would seem.  I’ve had vast stretches of off time that were used for extensive relaxing in addition to countless menial tasks meant to get my life in order and accomplish personal goals.  When Shaimus lost a guitarist this past spring (though we are making our triumphant return to the stage on August 4th at the Troubadour), I came upon even more unexpected free time than I had even planned on, and one task I’ve taken to has been laying down some music that I’ve been meaning to record for ages.  More on that in a (near) future post.

Some things over the past few months have gone oh so well.  Others have gone oh so poorly.  Such is life, so “they” say.  Although I wouldn’t mind life strictly going well for at least a little while.  A few months here and there, maybe?  I suppose I could be asking too much.  I think a recent story sums up my life as of late quite well.  Perhaps it does the same for yours:

Five years ago, I was at a party for student employees at Berklee College of Music, where I worked in the Media Development office.  They had a raffle with gift certificates to Newbury Comics, a popular local music/comic/pop culture store.  The biggest one was worth $100, and by a rare stroke of luck I happened to win it.  For a college student, a hundred bucks seemed like a pile of gold bricks, so I set it aside and plotted what CDs and DVDs I would add to my collection.  A few days later, it was gone.  Whether I had misplaced it, unintentionally thrown it away, or was the victim of theft I had no idea.  But there was no trace of it.  I silently cried on the inside.  Then I moved on with my life.

Flash forward to May 2009.  Hank Woods, my former roommate/one of my best friends/guitarist of the Mike Lombardi-fronted rock band Apache Stone, calls me one sunny afternoon. While this sort of occurrence is not out of the blue, what he asked me about was.  “I seem to recall about five years ago you lost a Newbury Comics gift certificate,” he said.  Turns out, while discussing the finer points of the music business with a friend, Hank had pulled out a book that he hadn’t opened since college.  What should fall onto the street but my old prize.  What are the odds?  And conveniently, just days later he was headed from New York City to Los Angeles and would be able to hand it directly to me.  I also discovered that Newbury Comics, a local Boston company, happened to have a website that I could order from.

What a rollercoaster of luck I was on–win $100.  Lose it without a trace in Boston, MA.  Have it found five years later in New York and returned to me on the West Coast.  Then to top the story off, after browsing the Newbury Comics site for an hour and figuring out what I would be getting, I went to check out only to find that you can’t use their gift certificates online.

Chalk that last one up to life, but I’ll have the last laugh anyway.  Just might take a little more than five more years.

This week was an interesting one in the world of Evan Brown (your favorite world, admit it). Last night, Shaimus played our last show with Dave Middleton, our other guitarist, and the band will never be the same again. No live playing for a little while as we try to find the perfect replacement. Auditions are officially open for those about to rock.

Also, for three days this week I had the pleasure of being on the set of the Sony Screen Gems film The Roommate, a thriller starring Minka Kelly (Friday Night Lights), Cam Gigandet (Twilight), and Leighton Meester (Gossip Girl). Two of our songs are going to be featured in the movie, and we got to “perform” them for the film. Phil unfortunately couldn’t make it one of the days, so Cam pretended to be the lead singer/keyboardist with the help of a little movie magic (i.e. lip syncing). Hilarious. He and I even got lines, but I expect mine will end up on the cutting room floor.

Leaving the set was sad, I felt like I was going home from summer camp. But I don’t exactly have the desire to be a movie star, so I can’t say I wanted to stay forever. Although they DID make my hair look cool and force me to wear clothes that “hip” people wear. So at least I was cool for three days of my life. I think the movie is scheduled to be released next year, so I’m looking forward to seeing how it turns out. Below is a picture of Cam, Johannes and I with director Christian Christiansen. He, like everybody else on the set, was a really nice guy. More photos from our time on the set, including glimpses of our prison cell-like trailers and my skin-tight jeans, can be seen here.

And finally this week, I accomplished the lifelong dream of appearing in an online video with Tay Zonday, AKA the “Chocolate Rain” guy! I present to you, Totally Sketch’s True Internet Story of Keyboard Cat:

I recently came across a blog called “Not Always Right,” which details people’s run-ins with moronic customers while working retail jobs.  It’s pretty addictive to read the accounts of jaw-dropping stupidity, and as someone who has worked retail in the past, I sadly relate to many of the stories.

I hated retail with a passion.  Customers tend to believe that since you’re trying to make them happy, they can walk all over you and treat you like shit because it’s their right.  Of course, not all customers are assholes; I met a lot of really cool, nice people while working in the accessories department of Guitar Center.  But the fact is, I have story upon story that would unfortunately qualify for inclusion in the aforementioned blog.

One of the reasons I left my Sunset Blvd sales post was that I just don’t have the right attitude for customer service.  When people prod me, I tend to prod back.  When someone tries to put me down, my initial response is generally to put them in their place with an acerbic remark of some sort.  I just wasn’t made for retail, it would seem.

One of my favorite stories from working at Guitar Center has to do with a very common occurrence of idiocy that happened every day in that store—people trying to haggle down prices on small items that they are not planning on buying in bulk. A guy came up to the counter and said, “What’s the best deal you can give me on those D’Addario strings?”

My first response when people asked me that was to simply turn my head, look at the price, and repeat it right back to them. “$3.50 a pack, sir.” His response: “Is that the best you can do?”

At this point I’m already irritated with the guy. He makes no attempt to work up a rapport with the employee who has the power to give him a discount. He is trying to haggle down one of the lowest-priced products of one of the lowest-priced items in the store, guitar strings. But I was usually happy to accommodate such requests if they were looking to buy 10 or 15 packs at a time. So the rest of the conversation went as follows:

Me - “Well, how many do you want to get today?”
Him - “Oh, just one.”
Me - “Is that the best you can do?”
Him - *grumbling* “OK, OK, I get it.”

He proceeded to buy it at—gasp—full price. From then on, a co-worker of mine referred to me as Evan “Is That The Best You Can Do” Brown.

1. A Charlie Brown Christmas
This is it: the special that epitomizes the Christmas season. A classic that children and adults alike still look forward to watching every year. Charlie Brown doesn’t understand why everyone is happy at Christmas except for him; he likes getting presents and everything, but he just can’t put his finger on what the whole thing is all about and why he should be so damn jolly like everyone else. Linus comes to the rescue by doing something you aren’t likely to find in most Christmas movies or specials: he recites a verse or two from, *gasp*, The Bible! (What were they thinking? How dare you remind anyone that this is a religious holiday???)

But then Charlie Brown gets it for the first time. It isn’t about lights displays or Christmas plays. It isn’t about ice skating or catching snowflakes on your tongue (even if they’re not quite ripe enough yet). It’s about a simple message of love, peace, and hope.

The immortal soundtrack of Vince Guaraldi added a new song or two to the seasonal canon, particularly with “Christmas Time Is Here.” And this is still the best Christmas special ever made.

Honorable Mentions
There are plenty of quality films and specials that didn’t make my top 10, and I’d like to reassure them that they haven’t been lumped in the same category as “Nestor, the Long-Eared Christmas Donkey.” Because that’s a special that makes me want coal in my stocking. And by that I mean hot coals in stockings that are actually on my feet.

Elf (Because smiling’s my favorite, too)
A Garfield Christmas (There are some amazingly cheesy moments, but it’s good)
South Park (Any X-mas episode is good. Mr. Hanky is the perfect mix of holiday cheer and shit)
The Muppet Christmas Carol
The Santa Clause
Bad Santa (Thurman Merman fills my heart with cheer)
Christmas Vacation
Emmet Otter’s Jugband Christmas
Mickey’s Christmas Carol
Die Hard (It counts. It’s also the best action movie ever)
Beavis and Butthead Do Christmas (Seriously, it’s actually pretty funny)

4. Home Alone
I’m pretty sure one of the first VHS tapes I ever owned was Home Alone. As much as I loved the movie when I was little, I can say with quite a bit of confidence that I love it just as much as an adult. The perfect cast and a great score definitely help it stand the test of time. So many memorable lines are delivered throughout. “Don’t you know how to knock, phlegm-wad?”

3. A Christmas Story
Another great example of how the right cast can take a good movie to the next level, A Christmas Story is not as goofy as Home Alone, but instead goes straight for the nostalgia jugular. I’ve found that some people can’t really get on board with this movie unless they grew up watching it, and that’s always a little sad. If you can fully appreciate this film, you know exactly why it is such a holiday essential for so many people. You also know that “fra-gee-lay” must be Italian.

2. A Claymation Christmas
This is probably the most obscure selection on my list, particularly for being placed all the way up at #2. It used to air on the Disney Channel every year when I was a kid, and I’m not sure if it still gets played anymore (I have it on DVD so I don’t have to worry about it). But for all the specials I looked forward to, this one might have been the most anticipated of all of them by my family and me. The concept is pretty simple: claymation characters (created by Will Vinton) provide visual interpretations of various Christmas carols, with commentary provided in between by our two talking dinosaur hosts. But the result is almost my favorite Christmas special of all time.

Most of the songs are pretty goofy and funny, but “Joy to the World” is one of the more serious ones. It’s also one of my favorites because of how cool the visuals are: