Unbelievable. Unforgettable. Unreal. Indescribable. And now, completely undeniable. I didn’t know what to do with myself today. I couldn’t sit still. I couldn’t calm down. I couldn’t think about anything but how great yesterday was, and what a rollercoaster of emotion this whole thing has been. What a way to end such an incredible season. There were flashbacks to key moments this year; to recent disappointments; to Joe Carter; to watching a team for my whole life and just wondering what it would be like if they won it all. The feeling of loving this particular cast of characters, and knowing I’d feel devastated if they didn’t get what I truly felt like they deserved.

The 1993 Phillies were a colorful bunch, for sure. But this Phillies team was just as special, and the gift they gave me of watching my team in a World Series for the first time since I was 10 years old made me appreciate them even more. Chase Utley, a cornerstone of the team, a still seemingly unsung player with the best stats of any second baseman in baseball for the past few years. He made the team a force to be reckoned with by storming out of the gates with an MVP first-half performance. He is the very essence of a great all around player that can lead by example.

Ryan Howard can bring some mixed reactions from some people, but the fact still stands: even when he slumps, a pitcher must fear him. You never know when he will bust out of that slump with a home run binge that will make everyone else look like they belong in little league. For every defensive error, he provided a genuinely impressive play at first base. Don’t criticize how often he strikes out; recognize that he gets more RBIs in a year than most players can even dream of. Oh, and we share a birthday, so he must be cool.

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While watching TV recently, a commercial came on for the American Express business card. In it, a man puts down his credit card to pay for lunch. On his card is a drawing of the comic book character The Flash, and he is laughed at, presumably for being childish, unattractive, and for maxing out his toy Playskool credit card.

But out of the corner of my eye, something else caught my attention about his card. Take a closer look at the screen shot below:

That’s right; thanks to DVRs and the ability to pause TV, I was able to confirm that it is indeed my credit card, which the dude must have stolen from me. And yes, my Brown Fabrics company is thriving.

Dear Ringo Starr,
Hi. It’s Evan. You don’t know me, but I’m a lifelong Beatles fan. There seem to be a lot of those out there, and apparently you’ve come across quite a few in your day. I’m sure you’ve gotten lots of fan mail saying how much your music has meant to them, how they can’t even convey the importance of Beatles songs in their life. They probably ask for a lot of autographs, too–for a little memento that maybe they’ve somehow managed to express a fraction of their appreciation to you.

But no more, I suppose. After seeing the video you posted on your website last week telling people not to send you any mail (presumably ever again) starting October 20th because you’ll just throw it in the dumpster, I figured it just must have been too much for you.

Maybe it’s only fair. You’ve spent decades having to scribble your name with a Sharpie, maybe you think that you deserve a break. I sign credit card receipts far more than autographs, so there’s no real way for me to empathize with you. But I just thought I’d throw a few off-the-cuff thoughts your way, from the perspective of a fan and wannabe musician, to maybe make your next attempt at something like this go a little more smoothly:

1) You know what’s a lot easier than making half your fans think you’re a jerk by telling them you’ll throw out anything they send without a second thought? Just stopping without telling anyone. If I sent you a Beatles lunchbox to sign and never got it back, I’d say “that’s too bad. I didn’t really expect Ringo Starr to mail something back to me anyway.” Then I’d forget about it forever and still think you were likely a charming guy.

2) Next time you decide to alienate a portion of your fanbase, try not to leave any loopholes open. For example, you only requested that no one send you fan mail or stuff to sign anymore. I couldn’t help but notice you failed to mention anything about hate mail, which ironically you may be receiving a lot more of soon (not from me, of course).

3) Don’t patronize us by continually saying “peace and love” to dull the blow of your message. If that got people out of stuff, it would have been used countless times in history. The folks at Enron could have said, “peace and love everyone, we screwed you out of your life’s savings while we got even richer, but we’re doing it with peace and love,” and all the employees would have said “well, my life may be ruined, but at least the CEO was shooting me some super positive vibes!”

I guess you’re a really important guy. I guess you chose this seemingly arbitrary moment in time for a good reason. And I guess this letter just missed being posted on October 20th, but please don’t try to throw my humble little website away. Not that you’ll be reading this anyway… You have far too many better things to do.

Sincerely,
Evan.
(Still a Beatles fan.)